End of the Semester

I wrapped up the semester today - finished grading exams and posted grades for almost 200 students. It wasn't nearly the joyous experience that it normally is, considering summer is looking as if it isn't going to be all that fun. Also, having my EMT practicals looming over me is causing way too much stress, and even though my instructor told me I could do them at another time, I just have to try. The thing is that I know I am going to be upset if I don't pass, while at the same time realizing that it is very realistic that I might not, because my mind is not clear and I have basically not slept or eaten well in, like, three weeks. I really don't want to go into the lumpectomy feeling all super bummed out and woe is me, so I have to manage my expectations and not freak out if I don't pass. I have yet to NOT kill a patient during the practice medical assessments we've done, but supposedly the scenarios they give you during the actual testing are not as complex, and they won't make you chase a disoriented and combative psych patient around for 10 minutes, so we shall see.

Anyway, in other news, I started the Lovenox shots today, and just like pretty much everything about all of this, they really suck. I remember it being really unpleasant when I got the shot in the ER, but I didn't remember it hurting for so long afterward. But maybe my technique is bad, lol. When I picked up the shots from the pharmacy, the woman asked me if I need a pharmacist to show me how to administer them, but somehow the idea of standing in the middle of the pharmacy with my shirt pulled up and my fat rolls hanging out seemed horrifying, so I told her I could figure it out. And really, it's not that hard. You gather up all your stomach fat, stick the needle in, and push down on the plunger. Even though the needle poke doesn't really hurt that much, that's the hardest part for me. I have to lie there and take deep breaths and count to three over and over before I can get myself to stick the needle in. I mean it's one thing to have someone give you a shot, but it's another thing to have to do it to yourself. I really feel for people who have conditions where they have to give themselves shots on a daily basis, although I imagine it gets easier with time. Still... ugh. I thank God for the company that came out with Xarelto!

Hopefully my next update will be a cheery one, and not a hysterical, pathetic one like the last one I wrote after I failed an EMT practical. If not, I apologize in advance. I also want to thank you all for your love and support. I want to reply to all your e-mails, and I will eventually, but I hope you can accept this generic thank you for now.